Light a candle in a bright room, and not much changes. But light that flame in darkness….and that tiny flicker has an outsized impact.
I went through a dark spell a while ago, and was having a hard time seeing my way through it. I felt like I was on a long march through a dark forest, without a clear idea how far in I had gone – and how much further it would be to the other side. It was as if I could hear the snap of branches in the darkness, things unknown awaiting me that I couldn’t see.
It’s not as if I had fallen out of studying God’s Word in this season – it just….it just wasn’t penetrating. I would read, and read, and read….and it was as if the words on the page just floated past me without sinking in.
And then…God led me to Psalm 42.
Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Psalm 42:5
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise Him,
my Savior and my God.
I will yet praise Him. I will yet praise Him. I knew the truth. I knew God was worthy of praise no matter what was around me. My situation felt bleak enough that praise was a heavy lift…but I knew I needed to raise up a banner of praise, somehow.
In the midst of the darkness, I began praising God. At first, praising Him for anything I could drum up…like, I hadn’t yet been consumed by my circumstances. (I did say things looked pretty bleak!) But that soon led to gratitude for other things that had held steady in this season. And that turned into remembering just how good God had been to me. And then…praise began to rise, simply because of WHO God is.
Though it was a challenging season, I’m grateful for that struggle; going through it keeps me dependent on God today, knowing that the dark forest waits just outside of my lantern of praise—but lifting the flame high in praise of my Jesus will light the way.
Thank you for sharing, I also have had these same experiences of spending time in His word but not feeling His presence in it. I’m doing an online Bible Study with Max Lucado’s book Six Hours One Friday I’ve read this book several times over the last 30 years, a gift from a friend when I was battling cancer. I have found for me and have been reminded in reading the book how important it is to remember Jesus. To stand before Him and wait and to “simultaneously see my utter despair and Christ’s unbending grace” Max Lucado.
I appreciate so much you sharing your spiritual journey, it is an encouragement to me and is teaching me to try to share my desire and struggle for spiritual growth.
Have a beautiful day.
There’s a facebook group many woman are going through. It’s Karla Dornacher’s book, “Hope In The Psalms.” We are studying Psalms 42/43 this very week. When I was going through a very difficult time of my life, this Psalm was an anchor for my soul. And years later another difficult time hit and this Psalm helped me again along with other scriptures as well. It has become my life verse. This time, Selah’s song, “You Raise Me Up,” which had just come out was also a great help. I was so weighted down with all that was happening: my husband lost his job, we were living in an RV, I found out I had Grave’s Disease along with other health issues, etc. My husband bought me a Miniature Pinscher who took my eyes off of the suffering we were going through. He became a light along this dark and rugged path along with my life chapter, Psalm 42 and another verse of scripture that speaks of not worrying about what you’re going to eat or wear and used the birds of the air and how He cared for them as an example with encouraging words that we’re are worth so much more than they are. God’s precious scriptures so helped me to travel and not stumble on the rocky road my husband and I were walking. He is so amazing!!! Praising Him for all I learned through it!!! I would so love if this became one of your tutorials on Youtube!
Thank you for your heart. Honesty. Openness. You, yourself, are a breath of fresh air.
This was a very inspirational post – thank you for sharing the verse that helped you and how you handled the issue.
The ministry God has brought me into the past 4 years has really been challenged in ways I never knew possible. Thank you for the reminder to PRAISE HIM anyway…I knew that and have done that in the past. But when this happened I’ve just been so distraught that all knowledge of past trials and how to deal with them has left me stranded.
Praise HIM I will!!!
I also have been in despair for the last couple of years, first I lost my mum (very suddenly) then my dad (who I nursed to the end) and then my younger sister who had special needs was taken so suddenly I was in shock. My sister was so special to me I was 15years old when she was born and I had wanted her my whole life and now she is gone to the Lord. This was the time I needed him to walk with me again as I am so fragile. The Lord has been with me all of my life and without the strength he gives me each and every day I would be lost I am so grateful for the care he has given me with the people he had surrounded me with. I still hurt that is normal. I read a saying that the only person who can heal the human heart is the one who created it and I believe this to be true so I put all my faith in the Lord my God always xxx